Im at strip club and am horny
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize