butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
