she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
