i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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