She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
