today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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