New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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