Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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