her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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