either way he was missing a nipple.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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