how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize