marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize