Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
