we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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