Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize
