Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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