what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
