I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
You don't make any sense
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