Dual....:-)
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
