I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i came on her dog
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing