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• (716): View more from New York

  there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days

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• (631): View more from New York

  Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (519): View more from Ontario

  Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  I'm in awe of how selfish that is.

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (808): View more from Hawaii

  At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.

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• (340): View more from US Virgin Islands

  Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.

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