He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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