you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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