she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
