theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
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