Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
There r osticjed everywhere
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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