Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize