1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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