Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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