i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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