i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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