Got a toothbrush?
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Randomize
