whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize