Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
that is very illegal...i love you.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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