Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize
