If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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