I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
it's not cheating when I paid for it
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
