I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize