omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
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