gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
