I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
