We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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