i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
