How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
