dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
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