If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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