FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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