she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
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