Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
