Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize