This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
