I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
